The above photos courtesy of Danny Ponomar at

Monday, October 8, 2012


Strangely it seemed so real.

I was driving out to coaldale to pick up my fare at this party. There were trains everwhere and they seemed to be travelling at random places without real tracks and it was difficult to manuevar around them while they were traveling at such high speeds. Once I made it out there it seemed like a company Christmas party. The adults were drinking on the one side and the kids were having fun on the other, playing with each other, just as kids do, but not sexually. OK

So I flag down a couple of guys and a gal and we are headed back to Lethbridge. But it isn’t the normal way to lethbridge. It was a magical mountain road and I was driving on the clouds. I came up to a tight turn on the road and was confronted by a train that was stuck or something. Everyone was laughing and having a good time when I tried to maneuver my way around the train. When all of a sudden it started to back up and it hit me. Maybe it was a semi/train. It was powered by what looked like a diesel tank like on a semitrailer. So this train backs up and hits me as I try to pass it. The female driver of the train, whom was wearing a blue conductors hat and a red collared shirt …. Anyway the front right part of my car was struck by the train which had fuel tanks similar to the diesel semis you see around. I punctured the trains diesel fuel tanks and raw eggs started pouring out onto the cloud road that I was on. Everyone started freaking out and the train driver said “my eggs, my eggs”, I was the only calm one at this point and the collision didn’t seem to bother me and I continued driving, scraping the train with the van on the cloud road and driving over the spilled eggs, which seemed to be everywhere and still gushing out from the egg fuel tanks.

So I get to town and stop at this bar and immediately leave for some reason. I then remember I had forgotten my passengers or they had forgot to pay, I forget. So I start driving eratically down the sidewalk of this brick paved road nearly killing people in my attempt to find my fare. I somehow found them and there happened to be a couple of pizzas and a salad in the back seat, the one guy sat on some of the pizza and squished it real good while the other two passengers were eating a different pizza. They were trying out this new gilligans bar.

Anyway that trip came to an end and I decided to drive downtown to another bar where I was confronted by some protesters that were protesting something or another. They were blocking my way and I considered just driving over them all to get to where I was going when I recognized someone. So I reversed into another vehicle, and kept going on my way to the bar. It seemed completely normal for me to drive right into the bar where a wedding seemed to be going on, before I could make it around the corner of the inside of the bar to where the real action was I was stopped by some dude who said “are you available”, I said yes and asked where he was going.  He said “man, I am so lazy, I just need a ride up the hill you just came down”. I asked how far up the hill and he said “about half way up”. I said sure and noticed on the television that a show was on in the bar. I commented “what are you guys watching the powerrangers”, I immediately corrected myself and said “no wait, it is the ninga turtles”, followed by “actually they look like powerrangers dressed like ninga turtles” and they were plotting some cartoon scheme.

So I start driving through this crowd of people and struggle up the hill due to my poor transmission which keeps slipping in and out of drive, if I was parked it would have looked like some huge animals were fornicating in the car it was bouncing up and down so much, like it had hydraulics I guess. At first the taxi I was driving was a white sedan and this was the first time I noticed from the outside that the taxi was actually a red van, and the liscence plate said “RETIRED” on it, from the previous owner whom I bought the taxi from I suppose. I got them up the hill and these gremlin looking things were trying to attack my van to get a ride somewhere and I sped up and ran a few down while a couple others clung to the roof of the van while I was swerving trying to knock them off. Green blood was spilled throughout the road, and my once white angel looking taxi was now an old retirees van with raw eggs and green blood all over it.

And then I woke up and wrote this about it.

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